Tonight's Best Comedy Shows

Comedy Club Discounts

Videos of the Month

More Videos

Fave Jokes

Archives

FringeNYC 2014

Massive NYC Theatre Discounts

Hy on Theatre

Buy Hy's Book

Hire Hy

Become an Insider

Site Index

Site Search

 

HyReviews.com

The Most Complete & Accurate Info on NYC's Best Live Comedy Shows
Stand-Up, Improv, Sketch, Storytelling, Variety, and More, Fully Updated Daily—
Plus Comedy Discounts, Theatre Discounts, Top Jokes, Top Videos, and More

 

From legendary NYC comedy site Brooklyn Vegan: Thank God for Hy Bender's religiously updated show bible Best New York Comedy (or HyReviews.com). He is literally the only person in NYC providing daily summaries of what's happening comedy-wise. It must be exhausting keeping that monster of a website alive.It is your daily comedy itinerary and it scares me how on top of his shit this guy is.

 

Hy Bender

 

Last updated on Tuesday May 26th 2015

 

Please click to go directly to:

Tonight's Best NYC Live Comedy (updated daily)

Comedy Blog (For Subscriptions, Mobile Devices): BestNewYorkComedy.Com

Have a comedy show you want considered for listing?
Simply create a Facebook page for the event—including price & lineup—
make sure we're FB friends, and invite me through that page

HyReviews.com's Comedy Special of the Month: Louis C.K. Live at The Comedy Store

Other NYC Live Shows: Half-Price via Goldstar

HyReviews.com Favorite Jokes

Previous HyReviews.com Comedy Videos of the Month

NYC Comedy Club Discounts—NO COVER on all Eastville & Broadway Comedy shows!

(Eastville Comedy, Greenwich Village Comedy, Broadway Comedy, Dangerfield's)

Hy's Book Proposal, Screenplay Doctoring, and Ghostwriting Services

 

NYC Comedy Picks for Tuesday 5/26/15

TV Alert: Marc Maron is on Jimmy Kimmel;
Chelsea Handler is on Seth Meyers;
Marc Maron, Mary Lynn Rajskub, and Dave Anthony are on @midnight;
Inside Amy Schumer's spectacular Season 3 continues with Episode 6,
"80s Ladies," at 10:30 pm & 2:39 am on Comedy Central

Cocoon Central Dance Team

Eleanore Pienta, Sunita Mani, and Tallie Medel conclude their superb run at The PIT: Cocoon Central Dance Team...

The Chris Gethard Show

...and the Fusion version of one of the most risk-taking shows on TV—tonight featuring the cast
of Broad City—debuts tonight on the Net. Catch it live steaming every Tuesday at 8:00 pm, or watch
the edited version every Thursday at 10:00 pm on Fusion TV: The Chris Gethard Show

Recommendations for the best in New York City comedy tonight

(in chronological order, with top picks noted and shows over $10 marked with $) include:

 

[TOP PICK] [FREE] 5:30 pm: Comics perform funny characters at The PIT upstairs theatre to appear in Montreal's prestigious comedy festival: Just for Laughs Character Auditions

[TOP PICK] [FREE] 7:00 pm: Ted Alexandro (one of the very finest stand-ups in the country; David Letterman, Conan O'Brien, Jimmy Kimmel, two Comedy Central Presents half-hour specials; comedy album I Did It; frequently opens for Louis C.K.) tries out new material every night this week at The Creek upstairs theatre in Queens' Long Island City: Week at the Creek: Ted Alexandro

[TOP PICK] 7:00 pm-11:00 pm ($7 for the whole evening): In this 4-hour extravaganza, seven of The Magnet's improv groups make up musicals based on audience suggestion, creating epic stories on the spot using song and dance: Magnet Musical Megawatt

[TOP PICK] [FREE] 7:00 pm: Comics creators join super-hosts Alex Zalben, Justin Tyler, and Pete LePage in a lively & hilarious discussion about four-color pop culture at Fontana's (105 Eldridge Street), with giveaways of comics and gift certificates (and if you can't make it, watch in online here): Comic Book Club

[$] [DISCOUNTED] 7:00 pm ($6.86 online using code BREAKOUT, plus 2-drink min.) Camille Harris (irresistible rising star singer/sketch comic/cutie; The Camille Harris Show; music album Silly Jazz) performs for the first time at the Carolines Comedy Club, along with Shakir Standley, Rip Michaels, and headliner Jacob Williams (America's Got Talent): Jacob Williams, Camille Harris, and More

7:00 pm ($5): Real life couples perform duo improv at The PIT upstairs theatre: Couples' Retreat

7:00 pm ($5): A staged reading of a play about a college student who becomes trapped in a video game at The PIT downstairs lounge: The Mystical Adventures of Dave

[TOP PICK] [$] 7:30 pm, 9:30 pm, and 11:15 pm ($12 plus 2-item food/drink min.): Tonight's stand-ups include Colin Quinn, Dave Attell, Joe Machi, Ryan Hamilton, Gregg Rogell, Nikki Glaser, Rachel Feinstein, Robert Kelly, Sam Morril, Pete Davidson, Zainab Johnson, Lenny Marcus, and Sherrod Small, with all three shows at Comedy Cellar (117 MacDougal Street, between 3rd Street & Minetta Lane): Comedy Cellar Tuesday

7:30 pm & 9:15 pm ($5 per show): Long form improv known as The Harold from UCB Chelsea house groups: Harold Night

[MEGA-TOP PICK] 8:00 pm ($10): A delicious blend of sketch comedy and dance from a highly talented three-gal troupe consisting of Eleanore Pienta (breathtaking rising star actress who delivered one of last year's best movie performances as star of indie feature film See You Next Tuesday), Tallie Medel (star of indie feature film The Unspeakable Act), and Sunita Mani (sketch/improv group Chester). For video samples, please click here; and if you like what you see, come experience this comedic artistic trio at The PIT upstairs theatre: Cocoon Central Dance Team

[TOP PICK] 8:00 pm ($20—which includes free slices of homemade ice cream cakes!): Elna Baker (genius storyteller, and bestselling author of comedic book The New York Regional Mormon Singles Halloween Dance; NPR's This American Life; writer for Glamour, Elle; for sample tales, please click here), plus additional storytellers Steven Berkowitz, Sandi Marx, and Morgan Pielli telling tales about this month's theme Panic & Anxiety at the Le Poisson Rouge's The Gallery (158 Bleecker Street) hosted by Robin Gelfenbien (storyteller and singer/songwriter; VH1, AMC, Sirius Radio, acclaimed one-woman show at FringeNYC) and that includes free ice cream cakes made by Robin herself: Yum's the Word

[TOP PICK] [FREE] 8:00 pm: Dave Hill (one of the most original and hilariously sharp alternative comics in the country; host of WFMU's The Goddamn Dave Hill Show; HBO, Comedy Central, NPR, bands Valley Lodge and Diamondsnake, book Tasteful Nudes, comedy album Let Me Turn You On), Aparna Nancherla (one of the finest stand-ups in the country, with a delightfully wry style and lightning-quick mind; Conan O'Brien, Comedy Central's Meltdown, Last Comic Standing, @midnight, Totally Biased, opens for Tig Notaro), Andy Sandford (Comedy Central, Adult Swim, The Beards of Comedy), Wendi Starling, Coree Spencer, and Nick Mullen performing stand-up at Cake Shop (152 Ludlow Street, between Rivington & Stanton) hosted by Sabrina Jalees (red-hot rising star; Comedy Central, NBC, MTV, VH1, host of My Sexy Podcast) & Liza Treyger (upcoming Comedy Central Half Hour, Chelsea Lately): Cakeshop Comedy: Dave Hill, Aparna Nancherla, Sabrina Jalees, Liza Treyger, and More

8:00 pm ($10): Interviews with Aparna Nancherla (one of the finest stand-ups in the country, with a delightfully wry style and lightning-quick mind; Conan O'Brien, Comedy Central's Meltdown, Last Comic Standing, @midnight, Totally Biased, opens for Tig Notaro), Josh Sharp (superb sketch writer/performer; MTV, co-star of GUMP, co-host of Cool Shit/Weird Shit), Emma Willmann (Bravo, Oxygen, AxisTVís Live at Gotham), and Maria Heinegg at The PIT downstairs lounge hosted by James Bewley (playing radio host "Dale Seever"): Dale Radio Live: Aparna Nancherla, Josh Sharp, and More

8:00 pm ($5): NYC stand-ups performing at UCB East hosted by Bill Stiteler & Tony Zaret: School Drools

[FREE] 8:00 pm: NYC stand-up and sketch comics (not announced) at The Creek downstairs lounge in Queens' Long Island City hosted by Nick Vatterott (Conan O'Brien, Jimmy Fallon, Comedy Central Half Hour, MTV, Second City): Last Week Was Packed

[FREE] 8:30 pm (reserve your free spots by clicking here): Typically terrific stand-ups (for the line-up, usually posted by 1:00 pm, please click here) performing stand-up at The Irish Exit (978 Second Avenue, off 52nd Street, in the back room) produced every Tuesday by Mark Normand, Matt Ruby, Gary Vider, and Sachi Ezura: Hot Soup

[TOP PICK] 9:00 pm ($7): Michelle Wolf (star stand-up who's also staff writer for and performer on Seth Meyers; MTV's Girl Code, IFC), The Lucas Brothers (Jimmy Fallon, 22 Jump Street, FOX's Lucas Bros Moving Company, Arrested Development), Alex Koll (Conan O'Brien, Comedy Central), Kara Klenk (writer for VH1's Girl Code & Guy Code and contributor to Broad City; Comedy Central, TruTV, Spike, Nickelodeon; host of If You Bring It), and more performing stand-up at The Slipper Room (167 Orchard Street) hosted by Seth Herzog (long-time Jimmy Fallon staff comic; NBC's 30 Rock, Comedy Central's @midnight, VH1's Best Week Ever, CBS): Sweet

[FREE] 9:00 pm: NYC stand-ups (not announced) performing for this free weekly show at Brooklyn's The Alligator Lounge (600 Metropolitan Avenue) hosted by Robert Dean, Sachi Ezura, and/or Steve O'Brien: Comedy at Alligator Lounge

[FREE] 9:15 pm: Stand-ups Anthony P. DeVito, Chrissie Mayr, Aaron J. Friedman, Taylor Ketchum, and Irene Morales performing at Brooklyn's Pine Box Rock Shop (12 Grattan Street) produced by Mike Cody and hosted by Sam Evans: Night Owl Comedy

[TOP PICK] 9:30 pm ($5): Writers and producers of The Daily Show perform at the UCB East theatre: The Daily Show Writers Stand-Up Show

[FREE] 9:30 pm: Sabrina Jalees (irresistible dynamo stand-up and red-hot rising star who could make reading a grocery list hilarious; Comedy Central's Nightly Show and Adam Devine's House Party, Last Comic Standing, VH1's Best Week Ever, MTVís Failosophy, host of My Sexy Podcast), Matt Koff (writer for The Daily Show), Janelle James, Langston Kerman, and more performing stand-up at the Kings County Bar (286 Seigel Street; take the L to Morgan) hosted by Mike Lewis & Tom Hathaway: The Party

[TOP PICK] [FREE] 10:00 pm: "Mike Guild knows everything about movies and films. He will take you through the landscape of the cinema, along with comic guests to discuss everything going on the weird landscape that is Hollywood—plus everyone in the audience will win a unique prize" at The Creek upstairs theatre in Queens' Long Island City: Movie Night With Mike

[TOP PICK] [FREE] 10:00 pm: Big Jay Oakerson (Comedy Central Presents, HBO, Showtime, MTV), Luis J. Gomez, Dave Smith, and other NYC stand-ups performing live on stage for this podcast show at The Creek downstairs lounge in Queens' Long Island City: Legion of Skanks

10:00 pm ($5): Nathan Min (Maude Night), Eddie Brawley, and Joe DiBella host this new show featuring stand-up, sketches, and improv, with tonight's guests Matt Cutler, Mary Houlihan, and group Fergus performing at the Treehouse Theater (154 West 29th Street, 2nd Floor): Slow Ride

[TOP PICK] [FREE] 11:00 pm: Typically a mix of superb and so-so stand-ups (not announced) performing at this free weekly stand-up show with a weirdly low-energy vibe at the UCB East theatre typically hosted by Phil Hanley: Chemistry

Tuesday Open Mics & Jams

[FREE] 3:00 pm: Open mic for parents and other comics who may have trouble going out at night but can steal the time during the day at Queens LIC's The Creek upstairs theatre: Momedy Open Mic

5:00 pm ($5): Two-hour open-mic for 20 stand-ups performing for 5 minutes each, with sign-up online here, at the Stand Up NY Comedy Club (236 West 78th Street): Stand Up NY Open Mic

[TOP PICK] [ALMOST FREE] 6:00 pm ($1): In this delightful weekly open-mic show, each comic has 3-5 minutes to try out a character-based bit (e.g., for a solo show, sketch, or audition) at The PIT downstairs lounge, hosted by Jamie Aderski: Personality Disorder Character Jam

[ALMOST FREE] 6:00 pm ($1): Open mic sketch that allows you to either perform a sketch with your own performers or bring in pages for the audience to perform at The PIT Green Room, followed by feedback on your bit from PIT "sketch-perts:" Pens & Pencils

6:00 pm (no cover, 1 drink min. for both comics and audience members): Open mic stand-up providing 5-7 minutes per comic, running 2 1/2 hours. Arrive 30 minutes before the show to get on the signup sheet. This is a fine opportunity to perform at the only comedy club in the East Village: Eastville Comedy Club Open Mic

[FREE] 6:00 pm: Open mic for comedy of all types providing 2 minutes for each performer (with sign-up starting at 6:00) at Queens LIC's The Creek upstairs theatre hosted by Tim Unkenholz: Butt Factory

[FREE] 6:30 pm: Weekly stand-up open mic, with walk-ins tossing names into a hat and set length determined by the number of comics who show up, at Bunga's Den (137 West 14th Street, between Sixth & Seventh Avenues) hosted by Jimmy LeChase and/or Justin Perez: Townies Open Mic

[FREE] 6:30 pm: Weekly stand-up open mic (with sign-up starting at 6:00) at People's Republic of Brooklyn (247 Smith Street) hosted by Dustin Drury: This Is Happening Open MIc

[TOP PICK] [FREE] 8:00 pm: This weekly two-hour open mic storytelling show allows each performer 8 minutes to tell a compelling and funny tale at Queens LIC's The Creek downstairs lounge hosted by Jake Hart and a guest co-host: The Dump

[FREE] 8:00 pm: Weekly open mic for any kind of act (with sign-up starting at 7:30) at Brooklyn's Goodbye Blue Monday (1087 Broadway) hosted by Joe Crow Ryan: Goodbye Blue Monday

[TOP PICK] 9:00 pm ($5): Open mic stand-up that's first come, first serve (signup starts at 8:30) and provides each performer 5 minutes—or 4 minutes plus 2 minutes of feedback!—at the Producer's Club (358 West 44th Street): Train Wreck Open Mic Stand-Up

11:00 pm ($3): A breathtaking 40 comics are given 2 minutes each in this rapid-fire open-mic stand-up show at The PIT upstairs theatre hosted with wit and energy by Jay Welch: Bring It

[FREE] 11:00 pm: Weekly walk-in open mic stand-up providing 3 minutes for each comic whose name is pulled from a bucket at Queens LIC's The Creek upstairs theatre hosted by Michelle Slonim: Rapid Fire

[ALMOST FREE] 11:00 pm ($1): A weekly improv jam for students at all levels to work on their skills at The PIT downstairs lounge hosted by Elke Reid and David Frasure: Study Hall

Best Inexpensive Stand-Up, Improv, Sketch, and Storytelling

Upright Citizens Brigade Chelsea
(307 West 26th Street; 150-seater; shows free-$10; one of the most respected comedy theatres in the world)

Upright Citizens Brigade East
(153 East 3rd Street; 99-seat main theatre, bar area for open mics; shows free-$10)

The PIT
(123 East 24th Street; 99-seat upstairs theatre, 40-seat downstairs theatre; shows free-$20)

The Magnet
(254 West 29th Street; 60-seat theatre; shows $5-$10)

The Creek and the Cave
(Queens' Long Island City; 40-seat theatre upstairs, 25 downstairs; virtually all shows free)

The Annoyance Theatre
(367 Bedford Ave. in Brooklyn; J/M/Z to Marcy or L to Lorimer; 50-seat theatre; shows free-$10)

Best NYC Stand-Up Comedy Clubs

Comedy Cellar
(117 MacDougal Street; among the finest daily stand-up lineups in the world; 2-item min.)

The Stand
(239 Third Avenue; recent competitor to Comedy Cellar; no drink min.—support this policy!)

Carolines Comedy Club
(1626 Broadway; focuses on the world's top headliners, who perform hour-long sets; 2-drink min.)

Gotham Comedy Club
(208 West 23rd Street; headliners on weekends, specialty & lineup shows weekdays; 2-drink min.)

Eastville Comedy Club
(85 East 4th Street; strong weekend lineups; no cover using code HyReviews; 2-drink min.)

Greenwich Village Comedy Club
(99 MacDougal Street; convenient if Comedy Cellar's sold out; no cover using code HyReviews; 2-drink min.)

Comic Strip Live
(1568 Second Avenue, off 81st; Upper East Side club with typically solid lineups; 2-drink min.)

Stand Up NY
(236 West 78th Street, off Broadway; Upper West Side club with typically solid lineups; 2-drink min.)

Laughing Devil/The Standing Room
(4738 Vernon Blvd., by #7 train; Queens LIC club; free cover Fri-Sat with code LICVIP; 2-drink min.)

 

To view HyReviews.com NYC Comedy Picks from previous weeks, please click here.

 

Other NYC Live Shows—Half-Price via Goldstar

 

 

Return to top

 

 

HyReviews.com's Comedy Special of the Month:
Louis C.K. Live at The Comedy Store

Louis C.K.

Louis CK in his element: legendary West Hollywood club The Comedy Store

If you missed Louis C.K.'s recent Madison Square Garden shows, don't fret. His just-released video album Louis C.K. Live at The Comedy Store contains most of the same material—and is actually better than the MSG events because Louis is more relaxed and intimate in this comedy club setting. Plus the hour-long show is beautifully shot, directed, and edited, making you feel like you're right there in a front row seat (Louis did the direction & editing himself). There are a number of highlights, including Louis' lowered goals for his body, his childhood discovery of death, a cinematic perspective that may keep you from ever seeing The Wizard of Oz the same way again, and a genius dramatic reenactment of what it's like holding a crying baby on an airplane that's worth the price of admission all by itself.

As for that price: a mere $5. Don't even hesitate, just buy it right now here.

 

Return to top

 

Special Freebies & Discounts for HyReviews.com Insiders

Almost all the recommendations and discounts HyReviews.com provides appear directly
on this site. However, occasionally I may feel an offer is so special that it merits extra attention.
Also, sometimes comedy clubs, theatres, and others contact me with offers that they
don't want on a searchable Web page but that they're happy to provide to my readers.

If you'd like to take advantage of such opportunities, please provide your name and email address, and once in a while you'll receive a notice directly from me about cool deals.

(Your email address will never be sold, rented, or given away to anyone else.)

Please use the subscribe box below to become a comedy/theatre Insider.

 

Return to top

 

 

Special thanks to comedy photographers supreme Anya Garrett and Mindy Tucker for creating so many of the stellar photos that grace this site...and the sites of hundreds of NYC comics.

 

 

HyReviews.com Highlights

Please check out these New York City theatre sections of HyReviews.com:

Hy on Theatre Discounts: See Great Shows for as Little as $4

FringeNYC 2014 Coverage

Please also check out these New York City comedy sections of HyReviews.com:

Comedy Club Discounts

Previous HyReviews.com Videos of the Month

Previous Comedy Picks

Top NYC Comedy Venues

Other Notable Comedy Sites

For a comprehensive list of links to all the sections
on this site, please see the Site Index below (or click here).

Return to top

 

 

HyReviews.com Site Index

Best NYC Comedy Tonight

Previous Daily Comedy Picks

Comedy Videos of the Month: The Classics

Previous Comedy Videos of the Month

HyReviews.com Joke of the Week

NYC Comedy Club Discounts

Become a Comedy/Theatre Discount Insider

Top NYC Comedy Venues

Other Notable Comedy Sites

Comedy in the Moment: Del Close Improv Marathon

Comedy Scene by Scene: SketchFest NYC 07

Exceptional Comics

Interview with Carolyn Castiglia

Show Report 3/28/08: Kumail Nanjiani's Unpronounceable

Show Report 2/28/08: Invite Them Up Ends Glorious Six-Year Run

Show Report 2/10/08: Alternative, Alshmernative—Kristen Schaal

Show Report 11/12/07: Andy Blitz Sees the Future

Show Report 9/24/07: Dave Hill Turns Things Around

Shockingly Delightful: Offensive Fest 2007

Hy on TV

Hy on Human Giant

Hy On Theatre

Hy on Theatre Discounts: See Great Shows for as Little as $4

FringeNYC 2014 Coverage

FringeNYC 2013 Coverage

FringeNYC 2012 Coverage

FringeNYC 2011 Coverage

FringeNYC 2010 Coverage

FringeNYC 2009 Coverage

FringeNYC 2008 Coverage

FringeNYC 2007 Coverage

FringeNYC 2007 Performers Gallery

FringeNYC 2006 Coverage

FringeNYC 2005 Coverage

Notable NYC Actors

Search This Site

Get Expert Help in Creating a Winning

Book Proposal or Feature Screenplay:

Hy's Book Proposal/Ghostwriting Service

Hy's Screenplay Analysis/Doctoring Service

 

 

Return to top

 

 

Comedy Club Discounts

If you'd enjoy an elegant evening at an NYC comedy club

but also want to save some money, please click here.

You can get free tickets for all shows at the Eastville Comedy Club,

free tickets to most shows at the Broadway Comedy Club, and

free & 50% discount ticket offers for Dangerfield's Comedy Club.

 

Return to top

 

 

Top NYC Comedy Venues

The following are the primary theatres hosting notable NYC comedy shows:

Upright Citizens Brigade Chelsea

Upright Citizens Brigade East

The Peoples Improv Theater

The Magnet

The Creek and the Cave (Queens LIC)

The Annoyance Theatre (Brooklyn)

Littlefield (Brooklyn)

Union Hall (Brooklyn)

 

Return to top

 

 

Notable Comedy Sites

I'm trying to keep this section super-concise,

but If a top site isn't listed that you think oughta be,

please drop me a note and I'll take a close look.

 

Comedy Coverage

(in alphabetical order):

The Apiary

BestNewYorkComedy.com

Brooklyn Vegan

Comedy Central Insider

The Comic's Comic

Dead Frog

HyReviews.com

Jester

 

Comedy Providers

(in alphabetical order):

Atom.com

Comedy Central Video Clips

Funny or Die

Jokes.com

The Onion

Super Deluxe

23/6

UCB Comedy

YouTube Comedy Videos

 

Return to top

 

 

Hy's Current Favorite Craigslist Ads

 

Please note: Note a word has been changed in the ads below. My comments are in boldface.

 

Poet/Artist/God's Wife Looking for a Literary Agent or Publisher

Date: 2010-02-04, 10:19 am EST

Reply to: kristiedono@yahoo.com

 

I have a wonderful poetry book, creative, wild images and a really good magical story to tell.

 

[You have a poetry book—um, with images and a story?]

 

I am looking to sell my poetry book with images and then my story to someone.

 

[So you have a poetry book with images...and you also have a story in an undefined form. And for some reason you need to sell the poetry before you sell the story...to "someone." That's a bit confusing, but whatever; it's not like you're claiming to be a wordsmith...]

 

I am God's wife, and the story is about our life together.

 

[Ah.]

 

It's got spirituality, love, tragedy, adventure, crime, violence, music, sex, a little bit of everything.

 

[Actually, you left out drugs.
But that's okay; at this point, drugs are heavily implied...]

 

I have a diary of our letters to each other, and the poems are like letters I wrote to God in a creative way.

 

[As opposed to the non-creative steamy porn that you actually wrote to your stud boyfriend God.]

 

This will be a big hit, it is a beautiful story, you won't be disappointed.

 

[The odds are good. God's last book was a huge bestseller.]

 

God is a black man on Earth and a musician. I have proof.

 

[It's a hip-hopera DVD titled Trapped in the Closet.
Thing is, God turned insane in 2000. (Which explains a lot...)]

 

This is a great story. I am also a great writer and poet and artist.

 

[And 100% real. You can check out Kristie's website at http://www.harttherapy.blogspot.com.]

 

 

Need Urban Ghost Writers (Metro Atlanta)

Date: 2009-11-13, 6:33PM EST

Reply to: writelikeyoufeel@yahoo.com

 

Looking for creative ghost writers with excellent grammar skills and ideas.

 

[Because that's what makes a writer great: killer grammar, and concepts.]

 

Male and females are encouraged to apply.

 

[Translation: Sorry, I don't work with hermaphrodites.]

 

Serious inquiries only...Please do not respond if you are not serious!

 

[Translation: I'm sooo tired of people making fun of me...]

 

 

Writer Wanted for Book to be Published (Hartland, WI)

Date: 2009-09-29, 1:52AM CDT

Reply to: job-tvm4r-1397614923@craigslist.org

 

I am writing a book and need someone who can

help me with writing my story.

 

I am seeking someone who is spiritual in nature

and believes that by reading this

you are the person designed to write it.

 

Give me a call at 262-xxx-xxxx and introduce yourself.

 

[Hello. I have been designed to write your book.

Thank you for fulfilling my destiny.

The days, months, and years of constantly reading

Craigslist ads in search of purpose have finally

been rewarded. I am eager to start work on

our spiritual instant classic I Was Born

to Ghostwrite Someone Else's Book.]

 

 

Writers for Wheelchair Book (San Diego—Mission Valley)

Date: 2009-09-28, 10:41AM PDT

Reply to: bouncesdtalent@gmail.com

 

Easy Life Inc. is looking to write a book about purchasing a new wheelchair.

We are looking for 2-3 writers to provide 200 pages of content each.

 

[In other words, we want a 600-page book...about buying a wheelchair.]

 

We want fresh ideas that relate to buying a wheelchair.

 

[Idea #42: Raise cash as drug mule.
Cops will never suspect crippled old coot like you.]

 

Please send a sample or two of your writings, your rates,

and 2-3 BRIEF topics that you would contribute to this book.

 

Writings will be submitted weekly for originality

and to assure you are going in the right direction.

 

[If you're going in the wrong direction, we'll grab

hold of your wheelchair and point you the right way.]

 

We want you to exhaust any and all ideas

that go into purchasing a motorized wheelchair.

 

[At which point the Seventh Seal will be broken,

commencing the Apocalypse.]

 

Once you have exhausted that

go into manual wheelchairs,

then walkers, crutches, etc.

 

[And after you've exhausted all hope of support,

we want to you to crawl on your belly before us.

Crawl like the worm you are.]

 

Previous SEO experience a plus. Local to San Diego preferred.

 

In the subject line: WHEELCHAIR

 

[Or just: END OF THE WORLD.

Either way.]

 

Take a look at our website at http://www.powerchairatnocost.com.

 

Compensation: $750 to $1,500 DOE

 

[Again, this ad is 100% real. If you have

fresh ideas about buying a wheelchair...]

 

Return to top

 

 

Hy's Book and Screenplay Services

In addition to this website, I run two commercial editorial services:

 

 

If you have any other type of writing or editing need, I can probably tackle it as well. To get in touch, please email me at hy@hyreviews.com.

 

Google
 

 

Hy's Other Websites:

BookProposal.net

HyOnYourScript.com

 

Return to top

 

Copyright © 2015 Hy Bender

Email: hy@hyreviews.com